June 2

Episode 09 (Part 2): Fictitious Death Metal Album Covers Episode 02

In episode 2 of our Fictitious Death Metal Album Covers segment, we roll the die to get Finland for Tony and Brazil for Nhat. Tony’s band name is Rupikonna Mestaus, which translates into Toad Decapitation and Nhat’s band name is Couro Guerra, which is Portuguese for Leather War.

Here is Tony’s album cover for Rupikonna Mestaus’ “Chaos In The Lilypond”:

RupikonnaMestaus001_Sml

and the back cover of Rupikonna Mestaus’ album:

RupikonnaMestaus002_Sml

Album Song List:

1. Chaos In The Lilypond
2. Poor Toad, Went And Got His Head Cut Off
3. Hypno-Toad Is Watching You
4. Cannot Live Without Dying
5. The Smell of Cortez’s Lunch
6. Keep Your Distance, Dildo Face
7. Stabbed In The Eye With A Microwaved French Fry
8. Amputee Love

Here is Nhat’s album cover for Couro Guerra’s “F*ck You, Human Face”:

CueroGuerra001_Sml

and the back cover for Couro Guerra’s album:

CueroGuerra002_Sml

Album Song List:

1. Fuck You, Human Face
2. Moo-der In The First Degree
3. Cow-er in Fear
4. I Fart, You Die
5. Sirloined At The Steak
6. Bonded By Cud
7. Bovine Intervention

Intro song of the week:

“True Colors” – M.O.D.

Outro song of the week:

“Blind Faith” – Kreator
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June 2

Episode 09 (Part 1): We’re Not Metal Enough

Tony and Nhat cover social media and if it’s fucking people up and dabble a bit in a few metal subjects, but mainly came to the conclusion that they’re not metal enough. Shout out to the Death Metal Dorkery podcast that contacted us last week as they seem to be well metal enough for all of us.

We talk about kids – what are they really good for? Just kidding.. They’re just not really our thing, but more power to you if you have one. Tony realizes that even with his new raise, he can’t afford a heroine addiction and we’re still waiting to hear from a reliable source where to get score some. We’re kidding. No, but seriously… what is Twitter good for if not for that?

Intro song of the week:

“Do Not Go Gently” – Animals As Leaders

Outro song of the week:

“Ride Out Bitch” – Vaux
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May 26

Episode 08: Sobriety Sucks

Tony came over sick as a dog, so he decided to do this podcast completely sober, which prompted Nhat to follow suit as well. This is our first sober podcast and it was a bit different, but I think we were actually a little more productive, to be honest. So needless to say, we hated it. Kidding. It didn’t turn out too bad. It’s Tony’s birthday weekend and it wouldn’t be his birthday if something shitty wasn’t going on, so obviously, he had to get sick. We talked about the best gifts we’ve gotten as kids and Tony brought up Shogun Warriors. Nhat’s was Krusher and his Super NES. We see some of the old-time commercials on Youtube, which makes Tony feel older and even shittier than he already does, if that was possible. We review X-men: Days of Future Past and re-review all of the movies we’ve seen this summer up til now, bashing Spider-Man 2 to the bottom once again.

Tony complains about work some more (get used to this) and Nhat brings up his work and then goes on a tangent about changing the entire school system as we know it. We end with doing a new episode of our segment Fictitious Death Metal Album Covers, where Tony selects a Finnish band called Rupikonna Mestaus, which translates into Toad Decapitation. Nhat selects a Brazilian death metal band called Couro Guerra, which means Leather War. Tune into the next episode where we will reveal our terrible covers, complete with song names and band members.

For your viewing pleasure, here are the toy commercials we were watching:

Intro song of the week:
“The Heart Beneath” – Celtic Frost
Outro song of the week:
“Terminal Liberation” – Mors Principium Est
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May 19

Episode 07: Tangentron 5000

We have no earthly idea what this particular podcast is about.  We vaguely remember reviewing Godzilla, talking about politics (as if we had anything even remotely intelligent to add to this conversation), wondering how useful the tiny pocket in jeans are, how some people are perpetually locked in their middle or high school heydays, trying to figure out if goiters grow, the longest word in the Oxford-English dictionary, if anyone has actually ever said “woo-hoo!” at a party and just a host of other useless observations.
“Where Dragons Dwell” – Gojira

Outro song of the week:

“Green Machine” – Kyuss
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May 12

Episode 06: Shitflix Episode 02

We sacrifice our time and sanity once again to review two more shitty movies in episode two of our Shitflix segment.

Nhat assigns Tony the movie Attila, made in 2013.

Attila (2013)

When American soldiers inadvertently steal Attila the Hun’s secret riches, the wrath of the barbarian is awakened; the mummified warrior will stop at nothing to kill the intruders. Nhat clearly loses out this week because as boring as Attila was, at least it looked somewhat professionally put together and the acting wasn’t too terrible.

Tony assigns Nhat to watch The Black Knight Returns, made in 2009.

The Black Knight Returns (2009)

When an evil corporation threatens to unleash the black plague, Evan Grail, is recruited by his grandfather, Max, into the order of the Black Knights – a secret band of warriors who have been called upon in the past to fight evil and injustice. Evan learns that his parents were murdered by the same twisted villain, Simon Darth, who threatens to unleash the plague. Evan wears the uniform of the Black Knights and must fight Simon’s evil army to save the day.
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